Parents, it is important that you remember, you are ALWAYS modeling behavior for your child to learn. The way that your child sees you behaving around others is very likely to be repeated. When you do things to or around your dog (or other non-human animal), your son or daughter may end up doing that too. To help your child be someone who your dog will want to spend time around, model and teach your child instead what he/she can do that will give your dog reason to feel comfortable, safe and happy. (Please keep reading to learn how you can see that your dog is or is not feeling that way.)
Being Dog Aware (a phrase coined by Family Paws, from which I am a licensed parent educator) involves getting to know your dog’s body language and sensitivities. It also involves learning about what may be a potential stressor for your dog, your dog’s ability to recover from stress, and your dog’s needs. Additionally, it includes being aware of the environment – including the activity of other people such as a baby or child – and how that can impact your dog.
Being Dog Aware is such an important piece when it comes to helping that relationship between kids and dogs succeed and practicing dog bite prevention. After all, no one enjoys being around someone else who makes them feel stressed, worried, and afraid.
No one enjoys having valued things taken from them, being scolded for doing something that fulfilled a need at the time, for having their personal space invaded, for being jumped on or having a body part pulled. Many don’t like being in the middle of chaos, or, if they do, may have a tendency to get amped up too which can lead to unwelcome behaviors.
Choose Your Time And Place Wisely
In one of our group discussions during the Family Paws course, someone had shared an experience when, after her child saw her clipping her dog’s toe nails, that her child thought he would try it too. She saw it and redirected her child before anything was done; however, that was a wake up call.
When you need to do things for or to your dog, pause and ask yourself if it is something that you want your child to practice. Remember, there are just so many ways that it could go wrong when your child tries to emulate what he/she saw you do. Your dog’s threshold for escalating distance increasing behaviors may be a lot lower around your child, and your dog is learning from experience whether or not good things happen in the presence of your son or daughter.
THIS ALSO GOES FOR PUNISHMENT. If you yell at your dog or take something your dog has in his possession, or another action more aversive, and your child watches you…Yes, there is a likelihood that your child may try it too.
Model And Practice These Behaviors With Your Kids
Inviting your dog to come to you instead of approaching your laying dog.
Sitting beside your dog instead of leaning over or hugging your dog.
Giving your dog things your dog values instead of taking things away from your dog.
Giving your dog distance while you dog is eating instead of getting into his space.
Staying away from your dog when your dog is in his crate or other ‘alone spot’ instead of getting into his space.
Doing loud and wild behaviors away from your dog instead of yelling, running and jumping in the presence of your dog.
Feeding your dog treats by staying in front of your dog and feeding with either an open palm or by putting treats on the ground instead of leaning over toward your dog and holding the treat in tightly held fingers.
Petting your dog by beginning under his chin and, if your dog wants more, then moving slowly over his body, pausing after a count to 10 and then seeing if your dog asks for more…instead of reaching over your dog’s head and moving your hand in erratic ways without stopping.
NOTE: please click here to learn more about the dog consent to pet test.
Practice understanding how your dog communicates.
Some ways your dog will tell you he wants space or the activity to stop:
a yawn
tense facial muscles
furrowed brow
tongue flick
body shake off (when not wet)
turning or moving away
change in breathing
whites showing around the eye pupils (called whale eyes)
roll over to expose belly (with tense muscles and either looking away or staring at you)
tail tucked
closed mouth
body made to look smaller
Red Alert warning signs
growling
snarling
lunging
snapping
deep barking
stiff body staring directly at the trigger
Note that if you see those Red Alert signs, you more than likely have missed your dog’s earlier discomfort signs and your dog has had to escalate his behavior. This is a time to intervene immediately and give your dog space. Don’t punish your dog for communicating as you will be taking away his last defensive communication before resulting in something worse (a bite). Instead, come up with a plan for preventing that escalation in the future. This may be a time to reach out to a trainer who uses and teaches positive strategies for behavior change.
